Never Do This With a Man

The Mood

Never Do This With a Man

But He’ll Probably Forgive You

This was requested in response by a reader to a companion piece, please take with grain of?and enjoy the show ?.

Some say men have been taken for granted lately, amid a barrage of accusations regarding our “horrid” gender.

While it may sting at times, not as much as people might think. Guys are already used to adversity, rejection and overcoming seemingly insurmountable challenges. That’s what makes us men.

However, there are things that can drive many guys nuts. Even if you’re a sexy woman, there’s something you can do that might make him head for the hills…

Contrary to popular belief, some things matter more than our sex-organ’ s attraction to a female. That “second brain” may be a powerful influencer, but some circumstances overwhelm even its power.

There’s something on this Earth more ignored than anything else: a man’s self-esteem. A dude is assumed to be secure, well connected and able to handle whatever life throws at him, because, well, “He’s a Man.”

In reality, we’re missing two letters from that sentence that reveal the real deal … add an “h” and a “u” and we get, “He’s a human.”

Yet, guys aren’t really allowed to show their humanity as much as ladies. Why? Because it’s not manly.

Many dudes find it difficult to express their true feelings around each other, and go to great lengths to hide any vulnerability because, again, it’s not manly.

Adding to the dilemma, guys take the brunt of rejection in romantic scenarios. Even with “Women’s Lib,” men are still expected to be the ones who ask a woman out. And no matter how smooth we are, we’ve all been turned down at times. However, I know many women who’ve reached middle age without having to deal with rejection even once.

So, men can deal with the adversity of “Great Expectations” without being allowed to discuss such hardships, and rejection is part of the game… What could possibly throw such “tough characters” over the edge?

What’s the one thing that can make a guy run away from you regardless of how awesome you believe you are?

Let’s revisit self-esteem, that most ignored factor in a man’s life… The modern woman is constantly told how powerful she is, how can she can do everything a man can do (and probably better) yet she’s still offered quick sympathy for any shortcomings. After all, she’s surviving on this patriarchal planet.

But to play the tiny violin of old-school sexism may be passé. Talk to a young person in 2022, watch a movie, check the news, read a book the professors are pushing…

In fact, many schools and TV networks are teaching our youth that men are dumb and lazy, and that women are the saviors of the Earth.

But heads up dudes: Only weak men get angry at women for this. It’s not women’s fault. It’s a culmination of social and technological factors that brought us where we are today… Just one example: During World War II, women headed to the factories to do “men’s work,” so men could fight in the war. That led to the discovery that some women were better workers than men. That realization wasn’t any woman’s “fault.” On the same hand, many men have abused their power over and over again, to the point that our gender deserves its tarnished reputation. Finally, there’s no denying that women are generally more compassionate and intuitive. None of this is men or women’s “fault.”

Regardless, the damage of the constant anti-male narrative to a man’s self-esteem shouldn’t be ignored…

And that’s what a man cannot endure forever: the destruction of his self-esteem.

No matter how beautiful a woman is, if she continually makes a man feel as small as a grain of sand, he may soon be as difficult to find as a grain of sand that just blew out of her hand.

A man wants to feel valued and accepted, despite imperfections— just like a woman. Lacking that, he may wander the open fields and starry skies until he finds someone who makes him feel loved for who he is — imperfections and all.

ps: men can easily forgive insults, but they often remember a compliment forever.

Thanks to Babar Saleem for requesting this story in response to the one about women.

https://medium.com/the-mood/never-do-this-with-a-woman-f6299ba24e05

joe